Like every girl, I dreamt of getting married to the love of my life. We met in college and soon fell in love. That was the most amazing time of my life. We used to grab every opportunity that we get to spend some time with each other. A few years later, we passed college and got high paying jobs right after completing our education.
This was when we decided to tell our parents about our relationship. Our parents were happy, but his mother pretended to like me. When he was around, there was no person sweeter than his mother, but when I was alone with his mother, she was a completely different person.
We got married amidst huge pomp and show. Those four days are still etched clearly in my mind like it was only yesterday that we got married. While I was a little apprehensive to face his mother, and was praying that he stayed close to me to protect me from his mother, deep down I knew that was not going to happen forever. After the first few days of festivity in the house, everyone left and I and my husband were required to return to our respective jobs.
This was when the worst time of my life began. My mother-in-law (MIL) used to load me with responsibilities in the morning, while she would not do a single job. Over a period of time, this started to affect my health and job performance.
After about a year or so, I left my job. The fighting, the drama, and the negativity in the house were taking a toll on my health. I began to stay indoors, had massive fights with my husband, and started to stay depressed.
Day in and day out, I used to think that this was the man I once loved and wanted to be with forever, and now that we are married, where is my life going?
One day, I thought “it’s been enough” and asked my husband to look for a home for ourselves. He was shocked at my decision as I was the one who used to always talk about staying with parents. But I have had enough. I told him about everything that was going on behind his back and I was surprised at his reaction. He was extremely supportive and decided to talk to his mom once before we decide on something.
He had a talk with his mother and she clearly stated that she did not like me. She did not like the way I talk, the way I dress up, the way I talk to people. Actually, she never liked me and here I was thinking that she was like my mother.
We decided to shift in a nearby locale so that we stay close to them yet far enough to maintain peace at home. I was excited to get married into a joint family where we can stay like a big happy family, often shown in movies. But I was wrong. Whatever I did to please my MIL, she would just end up finding faults in me.
Today, after 10 years of staying separately from my in-laws, as I look at my son, I promise to never treat his wife the way my mother-in-law has treated me. All these years I have yearned for a daughter, and the day my son will get married, my wish will be completed.
I will love her as my daughter and I guess she will be loved more than my son in this household.
Today, I want to take an opportunity to address my mother-in-law who could never become my mother. All I wanted was to be your daughter ma, but you never understood me.